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Can a Mixed Orientation Relationship Be Successful?

  • Jul 16, 2021
  • 2 min read

Updated: Nov 6, 2025


A couple sitting together on a bench, looking out at the Golden Gate Bridge.


Can My Mixed Orientation Relationship Succeed?


You've likely found yourself here reading these words because you have discovered you are in a mixed orientation relationship (MOR). Congratulations! I'm just kidding. But really, though, that doesn't have to be a bad thing. Finding out that your partner's sexual orientation is different from your own can be an extreme shock. Especially if you have spent any significant amount of time thinking that you knew everything about this person you love. The circumstances of discovery can often complicate matters further. In a perfect world, our loved ones would feel confident and comfortable enough to come to us and tell us how they feel, but reality isn't always that simple.


It is not uncommon to feel betrayed, hurt, and confused when finding out that your partner is gay, bisexual, or questioning their sexuality. How could they have hidden this from me? What else could they be hiding? How will I ever be enough for them? Do I even know who this person is? Does this mean our relationship has to end? Can a Mixed Orientation Relationship Be Successful? You can drive yourself mad with all the worry and anxiety as you begin to question if any part of your relationship was ever real. A lot of times, it is hard to find anyone who understands. Confiding in others who have never experienced this can often fuel the fire as they try to help, but only end up adding to your fears. It can be a lot to process. It is important to take a deep breath, take a step back, and remember that you don't yet know what you don't know, but together you can figure it out.


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Hi, I'm Candice

I help you find
clarity in love

and life

As a Master Certified Life Coach, LGBTQ+ ally, and relational wellness advocate, I support individuals and couples, especially those in mixed-orientation relationships, as they navigate complexity, strengthen connection, and build a life that feels true to who they are.

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